Let’s Talk About Suicide: Prevention Starts With A Conversation
September 10 is World Suicide Prevention Day. Suicide is a growing health issue – even more now with the COVID-19 pandemic. The pandemic has left us all with social, economic, health, and mental health uncertainties and, across the world, people are struggling to cope.
Before COVID, someone took their life every 40 seconds, according to the World Health Organisation (WHO). In South Africa, 23 people take their lives every day. For every suicide that results in death, there are as many as 20 attempted suicides. Suicide is the leading cause of death for people aged 15 to 29, and accounts for 9.5% of all South African teen deaths.
Mental health crisis calls to helplines, doctors, hospital emergency rooms, and places of worship have more than doubled since the start of the COVID lockdown.
Suicide Affects All Of Us
Most of us know somebody who has felt suicidal, has attempted to take their own life, or has died by suicide. The University of Kentucky has found that up to 135 people are affected by one suicide death.
World Suicide Prevention Day gives us time to reflect on their memories; to consider that every life matters; and remember that there are always solutions. “Some days we all want to give up,” says Kefilwe Mojapelo, psycho-social therapist. “But no matter how bad things seem, there’s always hope.”
Suicide Is A Preventable Tragedy
One of the main goals of World Suicide Prevention Day is to increase awareness about suicidal behaviours and how to effectively prevent them. And with awareness comes action. “If you have a colleague or loved one who’s confided in you about having suicidal thoughts, or if you see a post on social media post about someone’s intentions to harm themselves, it is critical that you take action immediately,” says Mojapelo.
Risk Factors and Warning Signs
Suicide does not have a single cause. The combination of individual, relationship, community, and societal factors all contribute to the risk of suicide.
Risk factors are what they sound like – issues in a person’s life that increase the risk of them acting on suicidal thoughts. The more challenges a person has, the lower the number of protective factors, the greater the risk.
Risk factors include:
- Family history of suicide
- History of abuse, domestic violence, child maltreatment
- Previous suicide attempts – research shows that up to 50% of people who try to take their lives, will eventually die by suicide
- Presence of a mental illness, particularly depression
- Alcohol and substance abuse
- Lack or unwillingness to access mental health treatment
- Loss (relational, social, work, or financial)
- Physical illness or disability
We all have different ways of coping with challenges. Risk factors alone cannot predict suicide as there may be protective factors like a strong family bond that balances the negative. There are a range of protective factors that can help to reduce suicidal behaviour.
Protective factors include:
- Strong, positive relationships with parents, guardians, friends
- Feeling secure and supported
- Academic / work achievement
- Feeling a sense of belonging to something bigger than themselves – community, culture, religion, sports team
- Good problem solving, conflict resolution, and non-violent ways of handling disputes
- Neighbourhood safety
- Awareness of and access to local health services
Warning signs are more immediate and may indicate the possibility of suicide. Suicide warning signs should always be taken very seriously. If we can learn what puts someone at higher risk for suicide and can spot the warning signs early enough, we can take action and save a life.
Warning signs that someone isn’t coping include:
- A sense of hopelessness, no sense of a different future.
- Isolation or feeling alone: “No one understands me”.
- Anger, aggression, hostility and irritability: “Leave me alone”.
- Possessing lethal means like medication, sharp objects, weapons.
- Negative view of self: “I am worthless”, “You would be better off without me”.
- Drastic changes in mood, appearance and behaviour.
- Frequently talking or writing about death – “If I died, would you miss me?”
- Self-harming and risky behaviours like self-harming, driving drunk.
- Making funeral arrangements, writing a will.
- Overt suicide threats: “Sometimes I feel like I just want to die”.
- Posting on social media: “It’s time to say goodbye”
- Giving things away like clothes or expensive gifts: “When I am gone, I want you to have this”.
It can be very scary when someone you care about is considering taking their own life. “We are often terrified that we might make things worse,” says Mojapelo. “Many people fear that asking about suicide will put the thought into someone’s head – that is not true.”
Experts all agree that it is vital to bear in mind that people who are thinking about suicide don’t want to die. Rather, they have no idea how to try and cope with their pain. “All I could see ahead in my life was pain and suffering, I didn’t know what else to do,” says suicide survivor, Daryl Brown. With support, people can find better ways to manage their distress and get through the crisis.
Ask and Listen
The best way to understand how someone is feeling is by asking and listening.
If you are concerned that something is wrong, talk to them. Let them know you’re concerned and want to help.
“I’m really worried about you. Can we talk?”
“I’ve been noticing that you are (sad/distant/not yourself). I am really concerned. Can we talk about what’s been bothering you?”
“You haven’t been acting like yourself lately. Let’s talk about what’s going on.”
Mojapelo advises that even if you aren’t sure quite what to say, the important thing is that you say something. “Let your loved one know that you are concerned and why.” Your interest shows that you’re willing to talk about their mental health – or any problems or difficulties they’re going through – whenever they’re ready.
Mental Wellbeing And Suicide Prevention All Starts With A Conversation
Talking about suicide is an important first step in challenging societal taboos and debunking suicide myths and stigmas. Mental health issues should not be hidden. Only by talking about mental health issues, openly discussing suicide, giving a voice to those who suffer, and showing concern and support can we hope to prevent the scourge of suicide.
This World Suicide Prevention Day, let’s talk about suicide.
If you are depressed, not coping or feeling suicidal, please contact us on 0861 GOLIFE (465433) or email: golife@healthichoices.com or SMS 43821 for support, advice and counselling.